New Year's Resolution

The Big MELTDOWN

I’m not sure what day it is. Our daughter isn’t in school, I know Christmas is behind me, but I haven’t heard fireworks yet and the big ball hasn’t dropped. It’s all very confusing. As a new-ish entrepreneur, I’m not sure if I should be burning the midnight oil, or doing lots of child’s poses in preparation to hit it hard come January 2nd.   

The decisions I’ve made in the past year were not in haste, nor were they easy. What I’ve learned is that there’s lots more to learn, a lot more people to learn from and more fun and satisfaction to be had.

I had a ridiculously difficult time deciding on a name for my business, the details of which I will spare you, apart from opting for the word “rendered”. I first recall using rendered on a regular basis in design school referring to coloring our black ink / pencil drawings with uber expensive markers we bought from the campus book store. We’d go in together to get the minimum required palette per our instructor. That made for some nasty finger pointing when the caps mysteriously disappeared and all that was left was a dull, grayed-out nub. Fittingly, render also means “to do a service for another”. Perfect!

When my husband (then boyfriend), who can often be mistaken for Alton Brown or more legitimately, the Swedish Chef, began wooing me with his kitchen skills, I remembered another meaning for rendered which is “to dissolve or melt”. Ah ha! Yep, I melt whenever my hubby looks at me with his dreamy blue eyes, and I do appreciate when he whips up the best roux (with melted butter) this side of the Atlantic Ocean. And yes, I’ve been known to have the occasional meltdown, of which I’m not proud.

I start to wonder if there’s a certain age in which we cannot unlearn unwanted behaviors such as meltdowns and curating large piles of laundry to the point of not knowing what’s clean and what’s dirty. This starts me thinking about resolutions, you know, the ubiquitous New Year’s variety. I’ve had several thoughts about what mine will be for 2017 in the past few weeks, but decided it might benefit me to look up the definition for resolve / resolution before I finalize my list. Guess what I found? The very first definition of Resolve - obsolete :  dissolve, melt!  Again, with the melt! That struck my funny bone. It’s just one big ole Meltdown.

I think I’ll be more in control of meltdowns and crankmonsters in 2017. I think I’ll be more mindful of the extreme importance of everyday kindness and generosity. Perhaps a simple, but powerful look up from my reading or typing to acknowledge my daughter’s question. Or an extra squeeze of my husband’s hand while we’re walking or watching a movie to let him know I’m thinking of him.

What will you resolve to do or be next year? What services can you render for another? How can you treat yourself more kindly?

What type of cheese is going in your grilled sandwich, cause I know you want one right about now....?